We Experience a Lack of Love Because of our Own Concept of Love
Preethaji – Author of Four Sacred Secrets • September 26, 2022
Written by Preethaji –
Author of Four Sacred Secrets
We define love based on our personal experiences. Every opinion we have about the expression of love – from the gestures of love to descriptive words about it – is based upon what we have seen or felt in the name of love.
We have a tendency to generalize about love and to repeatedly expect the same behaviour and expression of love from others. Even in the most loving relationships, it is unlikely that we’ll l see these same expressions with the same enthusiasm and energy all the time.
Even if there is love, our concept of love might not allow us to see it because of our expectations of how it should be. When our expectations are not met, we experience an absence of love. We believe that there is no way to feel better unless the other meets our expectations and demonstrates this expression of love that we have defined for ourselves. Contemplating our definition of love will help us discover a new joy in the relationship.
Meditation/Contemplation
- Sit in a comfortable posture and close your eyes. Inhale deeply through your nose, and exhale slowly through your mouth in total awareness. Repeat seven times.
- Inquire into any one relationship where you experience a constant need for more love. Observe the consequences of this dissatisfaction.
- Ask yourself, when do I feel loved? What should the other do and how should the other be in order for me to feel loved?
- Is it really possible for the other to be this way and do this all the time? Is it true that they don’t love you when they fail to meet those expectations?
- Find out what makes the other person feel loved. Do both your definitions match? What steps are you willing to take to bring greater love to this relationship?
- Place your palms on your heart chakra or heart centre. Feel how much this person means to you and how precious the other’s love is. Immerse yourself in this feeling.
- Take a deep breath and slowly open your eyes.
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