The Love Chat

So, I think we can all agree that relationships are hard. When we are triggered, our responses during times of stress are often dysfunctional and fall into one of five losing strategies as identified by Terry Real, Developer of Relational Life Therapy. They are self-defeating, leading to more discord and disharmony and ultimately stop us from getting what we want in terms of closeness and connection.

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Instead of focusing entirely on surface needs and desires, you learn to recognize the unresolved childhood issues that under-lie them. When you look at relationships with this x-ray vision, your daily interactions take on more meaning.

All the recommendations and relationship advice like “Affirm Each other, Learn each other’s Love Language, Listen to one another’s needs. Learn to fight fair” are good strategies for loving another person. However, there is one skill for managing conflict that isn’t simply about being aware of and intentional about your thoughts and your words. It’s also about being attuned to the signals being sent to and through your body.