Love Under Lockdown: How to Manage Relationship Strains During a Pandemic
Kathleen Maiman • April 23, 2020
You’ve probably heard the old saying that “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” But what happens to the heart in the opposite circumstances? The outbreak and spread of the current COVID-19 pandemic have transformed all of our lives in a myriad of ways.
Large parts of North America are now under strict lockdown measures, confined to the house for all but essential travel and outings. We suddenly find ourselves working from home, homeschooling our children, and spending all of our time with our family.
If you’re feeling the strain of being so close to your partner, you aren’t alone. It’s natural that your relationship will be affected by the new living conditions caused by the crisis. This article will help you understand why lockdown conditions can place unexpected strains on a relationship, before offering a few tips on how to both acknowledge and manage life under lockdown as a couple.
Why Are You Feeling the Pressure?
Let’s take a look at a few of the reasons why the current strict lockdown is proving to be so challenging. You may be struggling with a:
- Lack of boundaries and personal space
- Heightened awareness of your partner’s habits and ticks
- Inconvenient set-up when working from home
- Lack of routine with your household chores
- Build-up of tension after fights and arguments due to close proximity
- Sudden increase in responsibility as you teach your kids, manage your household, and look for “me time”
Tips to Improve Your Relationship During a Pandemic
So, what can you do to strengthen your relationship during a pandemic? You will no doubt find it difficult to be respectful and cheery at all times—and this is perfectly acceptable. After all, we are only human.
But here are a few strategies you can use to make—rather than break your relationship during the COVID-19 lockdown.
Communicate Openly
Many relationship issues stem from a lack of active communication. During the lockdown, try to be honest about how you are feeling. This honesty can go a long way to identifying a potential problem before it escalates.
Explain why you find your current relationship situation difficult to manage. Have a calm discussion about the various ways you might resolve any tension between you. Admit your faults and explain what you find difficult about your partner’s behaviour.
Leave Room for Alone Time
Spending time alone will give you the space you need to gather your thoughts and check-in with yourself. If you’ve found that you are arguing more than usual, alone time will give you time to calm down after a fight.
Try practicing yoga, meditation, or go for a run or for a walk by yourself. You may even find peace and quiet through video games.
If you’re working from home, do your best to keep your workspaces as separate as you possibly can. It’s important to create a distinction between your work and relaxation spaces.
Plan for Date Nights
Avoid spending “poor quality” time together. Remember, it is possible to spend hours and hours in each other’s company without ever having a meaningful, engaged conversation. Date nights are important for all long term couples as they can help you to see your partner through new, more appreciative eyes.
Now, date nights are more important than ever. Without them, you’ll end up getting bored and annoyed by your couple’s routine of sitting silently watching TV every day. Be creative about how you can plan romantic at-home dates—get dressed up, put away your phones, and enjoy each other’s company.
Socialise Virtually Without Your Partner
The lockdown can make it possible for you to go days or weeks on end without speaking to any adults other than your partner. Balance and mental stability will come from seeking out friends and family members to speak with by yourself.
A video chat with a friend will help you to appreciate the time you do spend with your partner.
Video Counselling Sessions Available With The Love of Attraction
Kathleen Maiman is a registered psychotherapist and certified Imago relationship therapist that offers couples counseling and other services.
Are you finding it difficult to manage your relationship during this pandemic? I am now open for video couples counselling, making it easy for you and your partner to work through this difficult time together.
My sessions are designed to help you reflect and come up with effective tools that will allow you and your partner to develop a strong bond and manage your relationship during this difficult time.
Even though the immense pressures of the coronavirus pandemic may feel overwhelming, it’s vital that you give your relationship the attention and care it deserves. Find out more
about the Love of Attraction telehealth services, or feel free to contact me directly
to get your relationship under lockdown back on track.
Register for our Newsletter and receive a Free Love Chat Package
This Package Includes
- The 5 Steps to a Better Relationship
- Ongoing Monthly Relationship Tips
- If you want more love in your life, our relationship Love Chat Package is an easy cost-free first step.
There are many highlights with the 2026 Olympics in Milan this winter. One of my favourites is the Ice Dancing Pairs. Watching them pursue the Olympic gold as a couple is breathtaking to watch. They are two people gliding across the ice as if they share one heartbeat. Every lift, every turn, every daring leap relies on
Every February, couples across the world brace themselves for Valentine's Day, sometimes with excitement, sometimes with dread. While the day can invite sweetness and connection, it can also stir up pressure, disappointment, or quiet resentment. As a couple’s therapist, I often see Valentine’s Day magnify whatever is already humming beneath the surface of a relationship: intimacy, disconnection, hope, or longing.
Ever walk away from a talk feeling more alone? Discover the 3 silent conversation killers—and the simple, heart-centered shifts that turn "fixing" into "feeling."
Every couple has a core conflict dynamic, a recurring emotional negative dance that shapes how fights unfold, no matter the trigger. It's not about who’s factually correct; it’s about the unmet needs humming beneath the words.
The holidays can bring out the best and the worst in us. Between travel plans, family expectations, and endless to-do lists, even deeply connected couples and individuals can feel stretched thin. While this season promises joy and closeness, it also tests patience, communication, and self-care. Taking it easy—both with yourself and your partner and loved ones —can make all the difference.
Money fights aren’t about dollars—they’re about emotions. Learn how couples can turn financial tension into deeper trust and partnership.
Instead of trying to "fix" your partner or stop fights, shift your focus to growth. Learn how a growth mindset deepens intimacy, builds empathy, and creates lasting change.
Helping is often celebrated as the hallmark of compassion. Acts of generosity and care can bond people, ease suffering, and foster trust.
In today’s digital world, screens have woven themselves into every moment of our lives. From the first scroll in the morning to the last glance before sleep: our phones and tablets are shaping how couples are spending time together. Just have a look the next time you go out to dinner and see the couple both sitting on their phone while waiting for their dinner to arrive. While this technology connects partners across distances, it can also subtly erode emotional intimacy when left unchecked. You are not alone if you’ve ever tried to talk to your partner while their eyes are glued to a glowing screen. In today’s world, screen time has quietly become the “third wheel” in many relationships.
When we first meet, we are the best version of ourselves. We take care of ourselves and show up as our best self. In the first few weeks and months of a relationship, we are on our A game. We dress up, plan dates, show up, have fun, we listen and we are in a good mood and say yes to new experiences and adventures. We a
